I need motivation

I am struggling big time. I have no time and no motivation. I am working on my second straight 20 hour day, I am eating like shit, and I can't manage to find the time to workout. My weight is fluctuating 6 pounds or so a week. I can't seem to get below 150 and stay there. I have NO will power right now.

I HAVE to start blogging here everyday and keeping myself accountable. However, I seriously don't have time. I am choosing to type here at 10:52 pm instead of either going to bed or finishing the test recovery packet that I need to have done tomorrow.

So far today I have gotten up at 4AM

Went to work at 4:45 AM
Wrote a student notes packet
Made 1000+ copies of all of the packets
Taught all day
Had 2 different meetins during my prep period
Scarfed down my lunch at 9:00AM because I give up my lunch to help students
Had 2 meetings after school
Came home and graded 100+ tests
Wrote a test revision
Ate way too much fucking food

And now I still need to put contact paper on 30 sheets of paper
Write a test recovery packet
And oh yeah...try to get some damn sleep.

I just can't keep doing this. Something has to give and right now it has been exercise and proper eating. I just grab candy to keep me going all day. Yeah...1 year of no junk food and now I am eating like I did before surgery. I know that I have to stop, but I am not certain how I am going to do that.

I have some big decisions to make and some prioritizing to do. And I desperately need to train. I have a half marathon in 1 month!!!!

Life can be mean

So just as I start to get back in the swing of things...my mother-in-law dies. It has been a terrible ordeal for the last 2 weeks but the outlook of getting back on track seems to be getting closer. I have lost a few of my "found" pounds but the result of the last couple of weeks have derailed the process a bit.

I am continuing to run and exercise and that helps a bit. I took another bereavement day today in order to catch my breath and get caught up at work. Then hopefully tomorrow I will be back to some sense of normalcy. We will see though. When it rains...it pours!

SOOOOOOOO close

1 hour 0 minutes and 58 seconds. And I am so damn proud. My first race back and I beat my PR by 20 minutes!!!! It was not as downhill as they claimed however! There were some significant inclines at the beginning of the race.

On another good note...I lost 3 pounds this week and am thankfully below that dreaded 150 pound mark that I had hit.

I am thouroughly exhausted however and am going to sleep so that I can get up EARLY in the morning and get to work to grade projects.

Okay...I'm back

I think I am doing better now. Pretty much off the meds and feeling more like myself. I am back posting on LBT.

I went and got a fill yesterday so that should help with being hungry all the time.

As for running... I have my first race tomorrow. It is a 10K that is pretty much all downhill so I am really hoping to run it in under 1 hour. I have been at the gym (or run) everyday this week except once and several of those days I burned over 750 calories.

Feels good to be back!

Meds suck

Okay...not blogging because this medicine is making me not give a shit about anything. Yes...I am trying to get off of it.

School did start and so far...I LOVE MY CLASSES. It is really the only thing I care about.

On that note I am going to bed at 7:30 because I just don't care to do anything else!

Torture...Day 2

Okay, I am supposed to be working with a bunch of highly intelligent adults that are specifically charged with educating our youth. So tell me WHY they would ask these questions during our training on the new phone system.

Q. It says to answer the phone that you can press the speaker button. What if I don't want everyone to hear my conversation.

A. Uhhhhhh...pick up the phone receiver. WHAT AN IDIOT!!!!

Q. SInce our laptops internet connection plugs into our phone does that mean that we still have to charge them with the plug in.

A. Yes. The phone line does not charge your lap top. That requires electricity.WHAT AN IDIOT!

Okay what makes this worse is that it was asked by 2 fellow science teachers. No wonder our country scores so poorly on science testing.

Yep...we will be here all week folks. Tune in for Karri's daily update on the worst week of school. Damn I miss the kids. They are the fun part of the job...most of the time!

MAKE IT STOP!

So this has NOTHING to do with weightloss, weight gain, lap band or running. So what do I want to stop.

MEETINGS!!!! When I signed on to be a teacher I apparently failed to realize the amount of MEETINGS that I would have to endure.

So what was on agenda today...

1. Breakfast of champions
a. Bagels (can't eat)
b. Muffins (can't and won't eat)
c. Doughnuts (haven't had one in over a year and not starting now!)
d. Bananas (healty but I can't eat them)
e. yogurt (thank goodness finally something that I can eat...though it doesn't keep you full very long!)

2. Rock, Paper, Scissors game. Sorry folks I can't make this stuff up... We played 2 different versions of this game for 20 minutes!

3. Introduction and welcome from administrative staff....At least I got a nap. Damn...missed out on buzz word bingo this year. Though if I had to guess I would say that COMMUNICATION, LISTENING AND COMMUNITY would have been the big three. But I didn't keep track considering that I was looking at the NEW standards that Oregon put out. Yippeee...I just got the old ones perfectly integrated.

4. Lunch - Healthier (salad, BBQ chicken, baked beans, potato salad). C'mon I didn't say UBER healthy...I just said healtier.

5. A recognition of those that have earned a degree in the last year....ummmm good for you, but what about those of us that ALREADY have master's degrees. Guess I graduated in the wrong year!

6. INSURANCE PRESENTATION!!!!! SNORE! Boy we have SHITTY insurance this year. It sucks for those of us that don't go to the doctor very often. We get hit with HUGE deductibles and copayments. I won't start on how much I HATE our union.

7. Are you ready for the most exciting part of the day!!! A 2.5 hour presentation on Sexual Harrassment Prevention. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

So that was my day. 7 AM to 3 PM! Why is it that I teach again????