I talked to the athletic trainer at school today and he is pretty certain that it is a small stress fracture. So I am breaking down and going to the doctor tomorrow. I didn't workout at all yesterday, but did an hour on the eliptical and 1/2 hour on the bike tonight. The trainer said that wouldn't hurt the foot, so I figured I could keep the legs working towards my run on Sunday. When I asked him about running on Sunday he said as long as I ice the foot and don't run on it this week that I should be fine for the 5K. He told me it might hurt, but that since it is a short distance that I probably wouldn't hurt it much more...but that I might not be able to get back to training for a week or two after that. I figure as long as I keep elipticalling (Yeah...don't know if that is a word) and biking that I can keep my legs in shape and hopefully not lose too much ground.
Well I am exhausted. Our sleep schedules have changed and we are getting up at 3:30 AM now because of DH's new job. Plus it is grading week at school so it has been pure hell! I will be glad when tomorrow is over and I get a break from the kids. I need it!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Need Advice
Okay so my foot hurts REALLY bad. I am going to go to the gym tonight and try the eliptical. If I can't do that I am going to ride the bike, but there is something that I want you to think about. I HAVE to do the run on Sunday. I paid for it and I am determined to do it. But more important then that I HAVE to do the marathon in Sunriver. Not because of money, not because of pride, but because it is something I have to do for me. That is my moment and my time. That is my gift to me for everything I have gone through. What I would like you to think about is this...I either want to run the entire 1/2 marathon or run/walk the full marathon. If I can't run the whole thing I am going to feel like I didn't accomplish what I wanted. Or do you think that I would be more likely to be successful running/walking the full marathon. I can tell you right now that if I finish the entire marathon I will feel like I accomplished a goal even if I don't run the entire thing. We have to consider the training.
1/2 marathon - running (much shorter distances but running the entire time)
Full marathon - combo walking/running (much longer distances, but can do cross training: walking/running/biking/elipticalling)
My ultimate goal is to run a full marathon next year, but I am wondering if I am pushing myself too fast and too hard to get to the 1/2 marathon. Or am I just being a pansy and just need to run through the pain? I don't want to make excuses, but I want to be realistic and not set myself up for failure.
1/2 marathon - running (much shorter distances but running the entire time)
Full marathon - combo walking/running (much longer distances, but can do cross training: walking/running/biking/elipticalling)
My ultimate goal is to run a full marathon next year, but I am wondering if I am pushing myself too fast and too hard to get to the 1/2 marathon. Or am I just being a pansy and just need to run through the pain? I don't want to make excuses, but I want to be realistic and not set myself up for failure.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Not Good...NOT GOOD!
Okay first injury of the marathon career and it couldn't have come at a worse time. I WILL be under 30 at the Eugene 5K. My foot is killing me. Best case scenario...just a mild bruise or sprain...worse case...stress fracture. Nah...Can't be that. No I am not going to the doctor because I am stubborn and I don't want them telling me not to run on it. However I do have a plan for this week so that I can stay working out and take some of the force off of the foot.
Tomorrow: Bike 1-1.5 hours....no stress on the foot
Wednesday: Eliptical ... Little more stress on the foot, but not high impact 1-1.5 hours (This was supposed to be my 5 mile day :(
Thursday: Eliptical ...1.5-2 hours
Friday: Rest
Saturday: Walk 3 miles
Sunday: Run that damn 5K in less than 30 minutes. What is a little pain right????
I did run 3.25 miles tonight before I pulled up from the pain. It was a TERRIBLE run though. I battled through the pain for at least the last 2 miles and I tried to wear my belt with water bottle, but it is just too cumbersome. I don't like it. So top that with 70+ degree weather (have never run in anything that warm before) and this run pretty much sucked!
Tomorrow: Bike 1-1.5 hours....no stress on the foot
Wednesday: Eliptical ... Little more stress on the foot, but not high impact 1-1.5 hours (This was supposed to be my 5 mile day :(
Thursday: Eliptical ...1.5-2 hours
Friday: Rest
Saturday: Walk 3 miles
Sunday: Run that damn 5K in less than 30 minutes. What is a little pain right????
I did run 3.25 miles tonight before I pulled up from the pain. It was a TERRIBLE run though. I battled through the pain for at least the last 2 miles and I tried to wear my belt with water bottle, but it is just too cumbersome. I don't like it. So top that with 70+ degree weather (have never run in anything that warm before) and this run pretty much sucked!
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Finished First 5K Race
Yeah I finished! Ran the whole way and finished with a personal best...34:30. The best I had done before was around 40:00 minutes. And I found out that my pedometer is miscalculating so when I thought that I was running 3 miles in the Dry Canyon, I was actually running 4!! The pictures aren't perfectly clear, but they will definetly work as a souveneir.
We were running on the new Highway 97 bypass that is to open to northboud traffic on Monday. To celebrate "Running the Re-Route" they gave us all commemerative t-shirts that were BRIGHT orange. We probably looked like escape convicts!
Next week is the Eugene Marathon's 5K run. Looking very forward to that one. It will be beautiful scenery and lower altitude, so I am hoping for less than an 11:00 minute mile. Next weekend's goal is less than 33:00 minutes, but in reality, I would like to be under 30. Don't know if it is possible but I am going to push myself this week. I got brand new shoes yesterday and they made a world of difference. My knees are not nearly as sore. I have a sore spot on my foot, but it didn't cause me any problems today.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
4/24/08
Well I did run those 4 miles tonight! HOLY CRAP, that is a long ways. Not to mention...I was sweating like a stuffed pig! My hair, shirt, and sports bra looked more like I SWAM 4 miles instead of running it! Thank goodness tomorrow is a rest day followed by my first road race on Saturday. Will post pictures then!
Food Demons
Today was just one of those days. The type of day that makes me think that I am never going to win this battle. I ate all the right foods, in the right proportions but mentally I always think that I am doing it wrong, that I am going to screw up and pile the weight right back on. I never want to be there again. I don't want to be hidden underneath 90+ pounds of fat. I have not found anyone on my online support group or my inperson support group that is at maintenance yet. The people at the in person support group are cycling in their weightloss. They have lost to goal, then gained weight, then lost it, and are constantly "dieting". I don't want that. WHy is it is so damn hard to just figure out how many calories one needs in order to survive??? Just give me a damn number and I will eat that amount and that amount only. I LIVE FOR RULES! I have so many people telling me that I need to stop losing weight (some for medical reasons with the TT). For the most part my friends/co-workers are thinking that I am getting too thin. Well I am no skin and bones that is for damn sure. I am pretty positive that people who didn't know me prior to my weight loss would not think I am too skinny, but when you are used to seeing me walking around as big as an elephant, yeah I probably do look small. I get really frustrated when people say "I WISH I had that problem". That is what I am getting from a lot of people who are still losing weight, or need to lose weight. I look at them and say...I hope you never do have this problem. It frustrates the hell out of me that people dismiss what I am going through because it is a good problem to have. Yes, I am eccstatic that I have lost all this weight and gotten to where I am, but damnit this is an issue to, and if you don't know how to show support or give advice, fine, but don't minimalize my problems.
Every week there has been excitement stepping on that scale and seeing it go down. I have not had one week where it has not gone down at least .5 pounds. Now I am supposed to get on that damn scale and be EXCITED when it doesn't move. Screw that! I am hoping that the tummy tuck will help some of the body image issues, because as you can see from the picture below, I look hideous. However, I dont' think it will. I am so obsessive about my calories. I weigh and measure everything that goes in my mouth. Right now I just had some tomatoes with dinner and I am trying to figure out about how many I ate because I didn't weigh them. I know STUPID. But when you have come this far, the mere thought of going back to that 250 pounds person is the scariest thing that could happen. I would rather be killed in some sort of horrific accident that every become that person that was buried under all that fat. I know what it is like to live life now and not feel like you are dissapointing everyone because all you can do is shove food in your mouth and look like a beached whale. I don't want to be that person that can't fit in the rides at an amusement park or can barely walk around all day without agonizing pain. Disney World was a blast when I went, but I can't even tell you how miserable I was inside (But yes Tina, if you are reading this, I still did have a great time). But now I want to go back because I could walk Epcot 93 times and not blink an eye. So when everyone is freaking out because I count calories feverishly and telling me to chill all the time, it does get frustrating. When people tell me ...it is okay to gain a pound here or there, well...I did that...I gained a pound here or there until I was morbidly obese. As my band mommy told me today "we want to be winners" and when I see a gain on that scale, I am not going to feel like a winner...and I am afraid as to how I will handle it.
I am hoping that someday this new maintenance eating will become just as second nature as the weightloss portion. But right now this is the toughest mental thing I have ever gone through. Well I am going to my exercise therapy (running 4 miles tonight. YIKES!)
Every week there has been excitement stepping on that scale and seeing it go down. I have not had one week where it has not gone down at least .5 pounds. Now I am supposed to get on that damn scale and be EXCITED when it doesn't move. Screw that! I am hoping that the tummy tuck will help some of the body image issues, because as you can see from the picture below, I look hideous. However, I dont' think it will. I am so obsessive about my calories. I weigh and measure everything that goes in my mouth. Right now I just had some tomatoes with dinner and I am trying to figure out about how many I ate because I didn't weigh them. I know STUPID. But when you have come this far, the mere thought of going back to that 250 pounds person is the scariest thing that could happen. I would rather be killed in some sort of horrific accident that every become that person that was buried under all that fat. I know what it is like to live life now and not feel like you are dissapointing everyone because all you can do is shove food in your mouth and look like a beached whale. I don't want to be that person that can't fit in the rides at an amusement park or can barely walk around all day without agonizing pain. Disney World was a blast when I went, but I can't even tell you how miserable I was inside (But yes Tina, if you are reading this, I still did have a great time). But now I want to go back because I could walk Epcot 93 times and not blink an eye. So when everyone is freaking out because I count calories feverishly and telling me to chill all the time, it does get frustrating. When people tell me ...it is okay to gain a pound here or there, well...I did that...I gained a pound here or there until I was morbidly obese. As my band mommy told me today "we want to be winners" and when I see a gain on that scale, I am not going to feel like a winner...and I am afraid as to how I will handle it.
I am hoping that someday this new maintenance eating will become just as second nature as the weightloss portion. But right now this is the toughest mental thing I have ever gone through. Well I am going to my exercise therapy (running 4 miles tonight. YIKES!)
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
4/23/08
My car key had a nice three mile run tonight safely tied to my shoelace. It begged me not to leave it behind again so I promised that I would always keep it tied someplace that it wouldn't get lost.
Monday, April 21, 2008
For those that haven't seen the before and after pics
For those of you who may not have seen the before and after pics, I thought I would put these on here so you can see what morbidly obese and merely overweight look like! Since the picture I have lost another 16 pounds! Oh yeah and I bought three new t-shirts at Wal-mart last night...Mmmm yeah they would be size SMALL! Last time I wore that I had to have been an infant!
Marathon Training Begins
Most of you know a little about my journey from morbid obesity to my current status as "overweight". According to the BMI charts I am still 11 pounds away from being a "normal" weight, but I could care less what the stupid chart says. I am NO LONGER fat! Thank goodness! It only took 17000$, a total lifestyle change, 12 wardrobe changes, and an unbelievable dedication to ME to get there. So as I approached my bandiversary (1 year anniversary of being banded) I wanted to do something special. There was a thread on the lap-band support group site that I post on that asked what people did to celebrate! Of course the one thing that always comes to people's mind when they think about celebrations is .... you got it...FOOD! Well that seemed a little counterproductive to me. So I thought "What could I do that could really show myself how far I have come and how proud of my progress I am!" Ahhh...yes I could run a half marathon. You ask why not a full marathon...You do know that is 26.2 miles right? Well I haven't been running for that long so I figured I would set a goal that would be attainable.
So let's see what I have done so far...
Ran my first 5K on a treadmill on April 16th
Ran my first 5K outside on April 21st!
What will I be doing?
Redmond 5K fun run Saturday, April 26
Eugene Marathon's 5K run Sunday May 4
Sunriver Half-Marathon Saturday, June 29
I officially started the training today and it was QUITE an adventure.
First it is tougher outside than it is on the treadmill. On the treadmill you have to make a concious effort to slow down the speed to a walk. Outside it is sheer will power. I read some place that a marathon is a test of the mind not the body. I AGREE!!!! I made it, and I didn't do too bad considering that I was in a panic on the entire second half of the run. I run what is called the Dry Canyon. It is 1.5 miles each strech and when I got to the turn around I went to check my stopwatch that was in my pocket to see my time. Well my car key was SUPPOSED to be attached to that watch and it wasn't! So I had to run back not knowing where I had dropped the key, whether my car would even be there when I got back, and freaking out how I was going to get in my house! I only live about a mile from the canyon, but I had locked the rest of my keys in the car and just took my car key with me! Then I remembered that there was this very polite elderly woman who told me to go ahead of her because she didn't want her to slow me down and so I had quickly shoved the stopwatch in my pocket. I figured that the key disattached at that point and that it was probably on the ground at the beginning of the trail...WHICH IS ON A VERY BUSY ROAD NEXT TO A SKATE PARK. I remembered this encounter about a quarter of the way back and I don't know whether to be relieved because I know where it most likely fell out of my pocket, or panicked because who knows who could have picked up the key and driven off with my wallet, car keys...and oh yeah MY CAR!Well panicking doesn't do much for the heart rate and breathing...both of which you are supposed to keep even. I was swearing, on the verge of tears and FRUSTRATED! But I made my 3 miles AND found my car key right where I figured it had to be. So now I have to figure out a different way to attach that dang key to the stop watch because I don't want to go through that again. I seriously ran 1.5 miles looking down at the ground for the key. Hunched over is not good for the breathing.So my first training day was certainly memorable. It can only get better from here! Well until the day that I have to force myself to run 12 miles on my own. The 13.1 miles on race day will be easier because you will have the adrenaline of the people cheering you on. But training...never fun.
So I am going to try and update this regularly. I invite you to read it, but I have to forewarn you that this will not all be roses! There will be days when I am not going to be postive! But please feel free to leave comments. I know I am not very good at responding to emails but, hopefully this will give you a glance at what life is like AFTER taking a LONG trip into morbid obesity and fighting my way back! Hopefully you will then understand where all of my attention has gone during the last 8 months!
So let's see what I have done so far...
Ran my first 5K on a treadmill on April 16th
Ran my first 5K outside on April 21st!
What will I be doing?
Redmond 5K fun run Saturday, April 26
Eugene Marathon's 5K run Sunday May 4
Sunriver Half-Marathon Saturday, June 29
I officially started the training today and it was QUITE an adventure.
First it is tougher outside than it is on the treadmill. On the treadmill you have to make a concious effort to slow down the speed to a walk. Outside it is sheer will power. I read some place that a marathon is a test of the mind not the body. I AGREE!!!! I made it, and I didn't do too bad considering that I was in a panic on the entire second half of the run. I run what is called the Dry Canyon. It is 1.5 miles each strech and when I got to the turn around I went to check my stopwatch that was in my pocket to see my time. Well my car key was SUPPOSED to be attached to that watch and it wasn't! So I had to run back not knowing where I had dropped the key, whether my car would even be there when I got back, and freaking out how I was going to get in my house! I only live about a mile from the canyon, but I had locked the rest of my keys in the car and just took my car key with me! Then I remembered that there was this very polite elderly woman who told me to go ahead of her because she didn't want her to slow me down and so I had quickly shoved the stopwatch in my pocket. I figured that the key disattached at that point and that it was probably on the ground at the beginning of the trail...WHICH IS ON A VERY BUSY ROAD NEXT TO A SKATE PARK. I remembered this encounter about a quarter of the way back and I don't know whether to be relieved because I know where it most likely fell out of my pocket, or panicked because who knows who could have picked up the key and driven off with my wallet, car keys...and oh yeah MY CAR!Well panicking doesn't do much for the heart rate and breathing...both of which you are supposed to keep even. I was swearing, on the verge of tears and FRUSTRATED! But I made my 3 miles AND found my car key right where I figured it had to be. So now I have to figure out a different way to attach that dang key to the stop watch because I don't want to go through that again. I seriously ran 1.5 miles looking down at the ground for the key. Hunched over is not good for the breathing.So my first training day was certainly memorable. It can only get better from here! Well until the day that I have to force myself to run 12 miles on my own. The 13.1 miles on race day will be easier because you will have the adrenaline of the people cheering you on. But training...never fun.
So I am going to try and update this regularly. I invite you to read it, but I have to forewarn you that this will not all be roses! There will be days when I am not going to be postive! But please feel free to leave comments. I know I am not very good at responding to emails but, hopefully this will give you a glance at what life is like AFTER taking a LONG trip into morbid obesity and fighting my way back! Hopefully you will then understand where all of my attention has gone during the last 8 months!
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Why waste time?
So it was just a few weeks ago that I even considered taking the plunge into the land of plastic surgery...and today I had my second and last consultation. All of the docs (including my lap band doc) said that there was NO way this flabby belly was going away without the hand and knife of a surgeon. Yet another reason to not be fat for 20 years! So I am posting the before pictures so that I can follow the process. These pics were taken about 1 month ago and it has gotten worse since then. I know you ask how could it get worse? Well if they ever need a recast for Jabba-the Hut in Star Wars, I could easily fill in as his SISTER!
The journey so far has NOT been an easy one. My lap-band surgery preparation was a breeze...decided to have the surgery, got financed the same day, set up the appt and surgery date in ONE phone call, had the consultation 3 weeks later, and surgery within 24 hours following that. No hassles, no weird doctors jacking up the price, just smooth sailing. NOT SO MUCH with this one.
1. Got financing through a company that only uses specific doctors.
2. Saw doctor in Portland...he said NO because it was too far away
3. Found that I could stay with with friends in Salem
4. Doc said still thinking about it
5. Got financing through another company but it won't cover ALL the costs
6. Schedule appt with new doc in MAY!
7. Original doctor says yes!
8. Financing company says doc raised price 5000$
9. Got the new PS to move up consultation and see me TODAY!
10. Met with second doc who is FABULOUS!
11. Paid down payment and set surgery for July 3!
Step 2 through 11 took place in LESS THAN ONE WEEK! It is no wonder that I am CRAZY! OH yeah then throw in the fact that I got married the day after step 2 and you can just picture my mental state. Just kidding on that one. New hubby is the greatest!
So I am scheduled for an exteded tummy tuck, with vertical T-incision, and a mons lift (google that one, but not at work!) She estimates the time of surgery to be SIX HOURS! Fortunately for me it will feel like 2 minutes! Not so much for those waiting in the waiting room! Hopefully he brings a good book.
Well this is to keep you all updated as I am not very good at responding to individual emails. Though if you email me I will try to get back to you. I am just very busy!
The journey so far has NOT been an easy one. My lap-band surgery preparation was a breeze...decided to have the surgery, got financed the same day, set up the appt and surgery date in ONE phone call, had the consultation 3 weeks later, and surgery within 24 hours following that. No hassles, no weird doctors jacking up the price, just smooth sailing. NOT SO MUCH with this one.
1. Got financing through a company that only uses specific doctors.
2. Saw doctor in Portland...he said NO because it was too far away
3. Found that I could stay with with friends in Salem
4. Doc said still thinking about it
5. Got financing through another company but it won't cover ALL the costs
6. Schedule appt with new doc in MAY!
7. Original doctor says yes!
8. Financing company says doc raised price 5000$
9. Got the new PS to move up consultation and see me TODAY!
10. Met with second doc who is FABULOUS!
11. Paid down payment and set surgery for July 3!
Step 2 through 11 took place in LESS THAN ONE WEEK! It is no wonder that I am CRAZY! OH yeah then throw in the fact that I got married the day after step 2 and you can just picture my mental state. Just kidding on that one. New hubby is the greatest!
So I am scheduled for an exteded tummy tuck, with vertical T-incision, and a mons lift (google that one, but not at work!) She estimates the time of surgery to be SIX HOURS! Fortunately for me it will feel like 2 minutes! Not so much for those waiting in the waiting room! Hopefully he brings a good book.
Well this is to keep you all updated as I am not very good at responding to individual emails. Though if you email me I will try to get back to you. I am just very busy!
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